Manitoulin Island-Radio.Net ~ Funstuff 2

Fun Stuff !!
Page 2

A Repository of For All Sorts of
Nonsense, Silliness and More {or Less?!} ...

If there is any 'truth' in the notion that laughter is 'good medicine',
then this page should be 'helpful' to all those in need!

Measurement Units … With A Twist!!

Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter = Eskimo Pi

2000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won Ton

1 millionth of a mouthwash = 1 Microscope

Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement= 1 Bananosecond

Weight an evangelist carries with God = 1 Billigram

Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour = Knot Furlong

365.25 days of drinking low calorie beer = 1 Lite Year

16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone = 1 Rod Serling

Half a large intestine = 1 Semicolon

1,000,000 aches = 1 Megahurtz

Basic unit of laryngitis - 1 Hoarsepower

Shortest distance between two jokes - 1 Straight Line

453.6 graham crackers = 1 Pound Cake

1 million microphones = 1 Megaphone

1 million bicycles = 1 Megacycles

365.25 days = 1 Unicycle

2000 mockingbirds = 2 Kilomockingbirds

10 cards = 1 Decacard

52 cards = 1 Deckacard

1 kilogram of falling figs = 1 Fig Newton

1000 grams of wet socks = 1 Literhosen

1 millionth of a fish = 1 Microfiche

1 trillion pins = 1 Terrapin

10 rations = 1 Decaration

100 rations = 1 C-Ration

2 monograms = 1 Diagram

8 nickels = 2 Paradigms

2.4 nautical miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital =
1 I.V. League

Old Words ... New Meanings?!

Accountant – Figure Head

Bunions – Achecorns

Gardener – Plant Manager

Chemist – Vial Fellow

Opthalmologist’s Office – Site for Sore Eyes

Sleeping pill – Nod Ball

Wig – An Assumed Mane

Witches – Hexperts

Wrinkles – Fretwork

Ah, Chemistry ... Sweet Chemistry!??

Two hydrogen atoms bumped into each other recently.

One said: "Why do you look so sad?"

The other responded: "I lost an electron."

Concerned, One asked "Are you sure?"

The other replied "I'm positive."

Puns are ... Forever !!?!!

A man's home is his castle, in a manor of speaking.

Dijon vu - the same mustard as before.

Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death.

A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

Sea captains don't like crew cuts.

Does the name Pavlov ring a bell?

Reading while sunbathing makes you well-red.

When two egotists meet, it's an I for an I.

A bicycle can't stand on its own because it is two-tired.

What's the definition of a will? Come on, It's a dead giveaway!

A backward poet writes inverse.

Fun Stuff !!

If you have any 'Fun Stuff !!' that you would like to Share,
Please send it to us by Regular Mail to our Sheguiandah Address,
or by Email to funstuff@manitoulinisland-radio.net

Each month we will Draw a name from all the submissions and
the Winner will receive a bunch of Manitoulin Island-Radio.Net
Free Stuff !!